TWO LAIRDS, ONE LADY by John C. Ryan tells the story of how Sir Thayer MacCourt finds and obtains the one woman to whom he compares all other women, Elspeth Mourney. Unfortunately, the novel has such problems with consistency, contrivance and credibility that it needs major revisions to be readable. I give it two stars and hope that it is revised so all readers can enjoy the plot ideas.
Six years separate Thayer and Elspeth's first encounter from their engagement, and after having seen battle, Thayer is not interested in making another widow. So he comes up with the brilliant plan to have his twin brother stand in his stead as the groom. Thayer figures that after about six months, he and Faolin can come clean with their mother. She'll see how great Faolin and Elspeth are together and won't cause a ruckus. The switch is made, and then Thayer begins to get jealous, finally promising his fiefdom to Faolin if he'll give Elspeth up. Then Elspeth's castle is taken by the English, Faolin and Elspeth's brother imprisoned, and drama ensues.
TWO LAIRDS, ONE LADY promises an intriguing story, but falls tragically flat. From the beginning, the story is bogged down by minutia, leaving the reader wondering if the story will ever pick up. Unfortunately, the story never does, and until the end holds onto its daunting pace. (The book ends nearly 100 pages after the climactic battle.) While I appreciate a book that doesn't rely solely on narration to move the plot along, here, many of the dialogue driven scenes can be trimmed down to ease the flow.
Also, stories in which two characters change places are classic, but it is important that the misconception is kept consistent. There were many places where Faolin's name was used where it should have been Thayer's, and vice versa. Even at the end, the big reveal only happens to one person. Every other character just automatically knows who is who. If it were really that obvious, one would think the original switch wouldn't have succeeded.
Aside from the glacial pace and inconsistencies, scenes in the book are often contrived or contradictory, defying logic, reason, common sense, and even the laws of physics. For instance, in the dead of night and without a torch, Elspeth goes out to collect herbs in the forest, and Thayer is able to discern her hair color, eye color, and lip color, even though there is only enough moonlight filtering through the trees to glint off of Elspeth's blade. Scenes such as this one strain credulity.
Many scenes also lacked continuity: Thayer is eating dinner with the mothers and leaves the table, citing a sour stomach. Several pages later, Faolin and Elspeth are coming into the dining room where dinner is waiting for the mothers' arrival to begin. Another scene has Elspeth on the ground giving physical support to her mother, and then suddenly Thayer is hoisting her off of his horse. It is one thing for the reader to have to suspend reality to believe a burgeoning romance, it is quite another when every facet of reality must be ignored to follow the book.
I was intrigued by the concept of twins switching places for a noble reason, only to have the reason fly out the window after the future bride has spent some time in the twins' company. It certainly puts the twins in a quandary with so many possible paths and outcomes. However, here, the book is in desperate need of thorough editing so that the concept can be realized.
*Review originally written for The Romance Reviews.com at http://www.theromancereviews.com/viewbooks.php?bookid=8035
